A New Day

Thank you for allowing me a bit of hopelessness. It was a hole I dug myself into, but some days you just have to allow yourself to feel exhausted and finished. Thank you especially to T from DSS for all her sage advice. I know it will be OK and that we'll be settled soon, it's just the waiting I can't stand!

So fear not, I've come out of the sorrow pit and am trying to be positive once again. I'm busying myself with The High Power Pregger's baby shower (whatever will I call her when she's no longer pregnant!) The theme is Toy Story and here is what I have so far:

Guests will come in and choose a character badge (a circular badge with a print of one of the Toy Story characters on it) and pin it to themselves with a baby diaper pin. They won't know it, but whichever character they chose will determine what teams they'll be in for the first game, which I'm calling Potato Head Baby. I've printed out silhouettes of a potato head as well as packets of photos printed on regular paper of the future mommy and daddy. Some of them have them making funny faces, ect. Teams will have five minutes to cut up these photos and paste them to the potato head, making it sort of a "if they mated" game that Conan O'Brien used to play. But super-duper more mature (because you know, I'm all about maturity!)

We will also play a trivia game based on questions concerning The HPP's pregnancy (cravings, aliments, ect.) and baby bingo, which The HPP specifically requested. I've made it Toy Story themed by creating a Toy Story bingo board, which I'll share on here when it's completed.

Favors will be "Oh Baby It's the 80s" 1981 pop song mixed cd as both the future mommy and daddy were born in 1981 and the cover will be adorned with their baby photos. I found the Billboard top hits of 1981 and can't wait to pick and choose what to include. Any favorites from the list?

Other Toy Story touches include the fabulous Toy Story invitation, seen above, a cowgirl hat headband that I'm making my sister wear throughout, red and yellow decorations, cupcake toppers (possibly these!) and special gifts such as a Jessie-themed blanket I'm actually crocheting. Do you know how hard it is to crochet a cow-hide pattern?

Feminist Friday: Your Husband is NOT Your Babysitter

Or live-in-lover, or baby daddy, whatever. If it's half his kid, he's not your babysitter.

Have you ever heard women extolling how fantastic their partners are by bragging that they "help out" with the kids, or "babysit" so they can go out with the girls. Have you heard mothers-in-law beam proudly at dutiful sons-in-law because they are "such a helper" with the children. Attention please: men are not assistants to their mothering wives or girlfriends. They are 50% responsible for the kids, they should put in 50% of the work, and when they do, they should be seen as good parents, just like their partners, not more so because they pitched in.

I agree with Straight Dope Dad when he explains, "It is insulting to both dads and moms to call it babysitting when a father is taking care of his children." (Although he is a bit harsh with moms stepping down.) It is a stereotype that fathers are only around to assist and give moms a break every once in a while, but in many household the stereotype rings true.

Watching A Baby Story the other day (don't judge, it was on) I noticed moms, who had just gone through what I can expect were the horrors of labor, want to nap, but are worried about leaving the newborn alone with its father. One new mommy explained, she "let" her husband take care of the newborn during her naps, which apparently made her very nervous. She went on and on about how he was such a helper. It made me very sad.

There is a baby amongst my in-laws, the only child of the next generation, thus this child is super watched after and fussed about. It was around this family and with this child that I first noticed an overwhelming emphasis on how helpful the father was, how we should let him rest because he "babysat" his daughter the night before, ect. I will be damned if such language exists around mine and The Professor's future (and most likely adorable) babies when we're around this family.

Modern men are equally sharing child rearing. They enjoy (gasp!) spending more time with their children and being an equal, or at times main, care provider. It puts down their intelligence and abilities to assume they can not cope with a newborn baby, or a screaming two year old. The only reason seeing a man push a stroller and act as main caretaker seems special or out of place, unnatural, is because of latent gender roles, ideas of what men and women should be doing. It is not an unnatural thing for a man to equally care for and tend to his children.

I've stepped off my soapbox for now. But for serious, he is not your babysitter! And now that I've surely galvanized you to notice such a nuanced injustice, I'll send you here to look at a grass bridge. For serious, it's made of grass!

Rock-a-Bye-Nursey

I won't even go into all the baby drama in my life. The fact that since The High Power Preggers has become, well, preggers, almost all our family talks about is babies. Or the fact that my in-laws want babies, from me, like yesterday. Or how I can't even count on one hand how many close friends/family members are having babies. Or the fact that I have very, very vivid nightmares about being a bad caregiver to babies. Or being pregnant. Nightmares, not dreams.

But I'm here to focus on something positive, the nursery for Baby H, who will be arriving in June. My sister, though talented and skilled in many, many ways, has not always had an eye for design. She wants a Toy Story themed nursery (sidebar, she had a Toy Story themed room as a highschooler.) And to her this means buying up every Toy Story brand item and shoving it into one room. Then, a hitch in her plans. The baby is a girl. There are practically no feminine toy story nursery items out there.

Enter, me. I try to explain to The HPP that once she picks a character on which to base the nursery, we can deconstruct that character and use inspirations from the texture and color of their clothing, and of course their theme, and create a cohesive space. This she simply could not wrap her little pregnant mind around. Enter, inspiration boards. I created two, one more traditional and one sort of weird looking to be honest (the board itself, not the theme.) The first is based on Jessie, the cowgirl. I was told by The HPP, "I want a Jessie room, but not a cowgirl room." Well, that's impossible as Jessie is a cowgirl.

Here is Jessie, our cowgirl from Toy Story.

Here is the inspiration board I deconstructed from Jessie.

The centerpiece for the room would be some sort of artwork featuring Jessie, possibly this wall cling. Then denim or red crib bumpers and yellow curtains, tied back with robe curtain ties. Cowhide elements would pop throughout, such as a faux cowhide rug, or this fabulous red and cowhide blanket. I would buy an official Jessie cowgirl hat and place it on a shelf. Other western elements could be introduced without being overwhelming, such as horseshoes as hooks, distressed red picture frames, and rope spelling out Baby H's name. Other decorative elements could be created using the red/yellow/denim/cowhide color story and incorporating other aspects of Jessie's appearance, such as a sheriff's badge. Red polka dots work well in this space, either by adding a red polka-dotted crib skirt or simple pillows throughout. I would also suggest a small lamp with a red lampshade accented by a light yellow ribbon.

Here is our friend Bo-Peep.

Here is the quirky inspiration board I created for a Bo-Peep inspired nursery.

With the Bo-Peep room I focused on our shepherdess' clothing, her pink polka dots, blue ruffled bloomers, and patterned blue top. Also I went a little wild for the sheep, they are just too cute and perfect for a nursery. I accent the blue (possibly Toy Story clouded) wall with pink polka dot letters spelling out Baby H's name. Pink crib fabrics would be offset by a blue and white patterned crib skirt. I found light blue, ruffled baby blankets and other fabrics which could be used as textiles in the crib or as curtains. The sheep bumper and pillows are also a fun alternative to the pink polka dotted crib. Finding an actual Bo-Peep lamp or figure from the film would tie this room together. The fun sheep rug would add some whimsy.

Here are some more detailed photos of Bo-Peep inspired nursery items.

Which room do you prefer?

For Love of the Weekend

This past weekend The Professor and I were determined to do something, anything, other than our rut of late (read: him, videogames; me, cross stitching.) So we created a best of both worlds weekend. Meaning, we had the best of the country, followed by the best of the city.

Saturday we planned to go hiking at the park closest to the cottage. We were late, however, given that our dog had a tick (gross, gross, gross) which she got from our awesome woods. Fantastic. After calling the in-laws, calling the vet, calling the in-laws again, and calling the vet again, we had successfully extracted half of the tick, been reassured twice that it should be OK and just to watch the dog. Then we went hiking. Which, by the way, was glorious. Oh, and at night we had a wheel barrel competition. That means we each took turns being the wheel barrel to see who could go the farthest. Yep, that’s romance in the boondocks.

Sunday we met up with the in-laws who had gotten us all tickets to The Blue Man Group in downtown Atlanta. Awesome day. I got to go into a city, walk around, smell that awesome city air, and see some percussion-based performance art. Afterwards we went to a funky neighborhood, found a fancy pub, and had delicious northern food (pierogis) and German beer. Life is good.

Sunday, however, was a long day, followed by the longest.night.ever.

Down the Lake (yes, you can use such expressions when living in the middle of nowhere where streets are irrelevant) there have been some new dogs which do not adhere to the traditional I’ll-stand-at-my-property-line-barking-while-you-stand-at-your-property-line-barking inter-dog communication. They routinely stride into our yard. This annoys our aggressive dog to no end. Last night was no different and every 45 minutes to an hour throughout the entire night our dog went ape-shit. This meant The Professor was outside, then inside, then outside, all night. We both woke up cranky, but unfortunately for him, he had to go to work.

This reminded me of one, very important thing. We are not ready to have babies. It also reminded me that I won a bet as to how many times the in-laws would make comments about the aforementioned babies during our day out on Sunday. Three times.